1. A man returned home one evening very drunk.
To prevent his wife from knowing he's drunk to
avoid trouble, he quickly took his 'laptop'
pretending he is busy doing something on it.
His wife went close to him and asked
Wife: You are drunk
again, abi?
Husband: Me drunk? You've started again oo
Wife: Then why are you typing on your brief
case?
l
2. A boy returns a missing purse to the owner
in a market. The lady was so grateful but
when she looked inside, she got confused
and said, "but I had a single one thousand
naira note, now there are ten pieces of
hundred naira note, how come?
The boy said, " na me change em, the last
time wey I help person find purse, she say
she for give me something but change no
dey....
3.CONVERSATION BETWEEN A MAD MAN
AND A NORMAL MAN.
Norm. Man: Why is that u people (mad
people) always laugh when there's nothing
to laugh about.
Mad man: Its because you people don't see
what we see in madness
Norm. Man: What do u people see?
Mad man: Have u ever seen an ant
breastfeeding it babies? Or dogs having a
marriage ceremony?
Norm. Man: Burst out with laughter..
Hahahaha
Mad man: U see how u are laughing now,
without even seeing what I used to see.. U
will even laugh more than me when u
become mad.
4. As a Man lost his cheque booklet, He decided
to go to the bank after 2 days to report. Here
is
the conversation between him
and the bank manager.
Bank manager : But I
warned you to be careful with
your cheque book because anyone can forge
your signature.
Man: I am not a fool, I have already signed all
the
cheques, so they won't have space to forge
my signature!
5. JOB INTERVIEW!
INTERVIEWER: Tell me the opposite of Good.
MAN: Bad.
INTERVIEWER: Come.
MAN: Go
INTERVIEWER: Ugly
MAN: Fine
INTERVIEWER: U're wrong!
MAN: U're right!
INTERVIEWER: Shut up!
MAN: Keep talking!
INTERVIEWER: Ok now stop all that.
MAN: Ok now carry on all that.
INTERVIEWER: Get out!
MAN: Come in!
INTERVIEWER: Oh my God.
MAN: Oh my Devil.
INTERVIEWER: U're Rejected.
MAN: I'm selected.
6. There was a time Akpos really loved a girl but
never had the guts to tell her.
One night, at around 11pm, he summoned some
courage and sent her an sms saying,
'I love you so much, I want to date u. Please
reply and tell me how u feel.'
A few seconds later he received a message alert
on his phone. He was soooo scared & tensed to
open it that night, so he decided
not to check the reply until in the morning when
he is less tensed.
When he woke up the next day: He said his
prayers, did his morning chores, brushed
his teeth, ate his breakfast, took his bath,
combed his hair, then climbed back to his bed,
balanced very comfortably and gently
picked up his phone to read the message.
So he started reading.......
.
.
.
.
.
"Dear customer, you have insufficient balance to
complete your request, kindly
recharge your account and try again!.
Akpos Fainted.
